tonight we dine in hell

threehundred was amazing
besides the fact that were 300 hot bodies running around
in NOTHING but leather underware
....
crap, that was pretty much the pull for me
but the CGI was fab - just amazing
only a blue screen to film behind? NO WAY
in only 60 days?
i felt like being jakun too and giving a standing ovation after the movie was over
:D

i know i haven't blogged in ages....
its just that there is nothing to blog about
im at work and im at work and then im at work again
the weekend practically flies by, but then again, so does the week
which means ill be turning 23 *shock* soon
andden the next thing i know, ill be 50
then on my death bed
my only comfort is that seems to be the normal cycle for every one in general
so if i suffer, you suffer
mwhahahaha

i can only entertain you with what has entertained me so far since i blogged last, which were significant enough in my life, but not significant enough to write an entry about:

1. they opened the mind and body studio at the gym - which means more pilates and yoga
the aim is to go 4 times a week - 2 cardio sessions and 2 strength/stretch sessions . ive only managed 3 times so far

2. i managed to get my itrip to work in harmony with my ipod and radio
so no more malay woman interrupting my little bopping sessions to fergalicious

3. rosebud has great stamina - during the week, she's in another country and during the weekend, she has an overnight in genting . respektah

4. mid week madness is necessity in everyone's life - every wednesday, kunt.um, boobs, gayve, mun and myself gather at boobs' hse, talk ABSOLUTE SHIT, eat ABSOLUTE SHIT, and drink ABSOLUT ;) geddit? okay, it would have worked if we drank absolut, but we are of a much more higher standard than that and drink grey goose . the aim was to play scrabble, but the goosey goosey gander kinda gets in the way

5. we found the elusive bayou chicken pie disguised now as the empress chicken pie. to ensure you die a happy person, you have to eat it

6. we found casa vino, of which they serve you great wine, for a great price, let you make noise and order food from the nearby eateries for you too . can you say heaven?

7. 300 made me happy for 3 days straight

8. i have training in genting next weekend for the WHOLE weekend. 3 whole days in aid to better myself in the advertising industry. 3 whole days of my life that i cant reclaim back. 3 whole days of which i have to be social. fark.

9. kanye west is coming down to kl on the 8th of april. and you can be rest assured that im going to party it down hard with the mat mots and the kak siti-s can you say "orang cari emas" ?

10. im finally done with 5 seasons of Gilmore Girls. no more lorelai, no more rory, no more luke, no more dean, no more logan, no more taylor, no more kirk :( i need season 6

11. im starting heroes now that im done with gilmore girls

so thats the update to my life
its pretty kinda pathetically sad really
no hardcore parties
no jetsetting life
no accumulation of obscene amounts of wealth
no rock n roll

sniff

until the sky decides to turn green and the oceans to turn yellow

xL

secret vows

ive been going for spin class

they turn off the fans
the class becomes even hotter
and there are 30 ppl there
you start smelling weird smells
sweat droplets are literally all over the floor
you start feeling faint
but you look to the side and see a 45 yr old woman going for it for her life
so you turn it up, thinking you can handle it
you can't
you start seeing stars and the music is trippin with your mind
your apparell is literally soaked with sweat
" i will stop smoking...i will stop eating lard...i will stop drinking...i will exercise more"
starts going through your mind
after 45 minutes
its all over red rover
and you, the sucker, goes back two days later for a little bit more

idiotville
population: 1
me

xL

and the other one said roll over roll over

so we are now down to 5 permanent friends in kl

kunt.um, boobs, small eyes & the sometime around gayve

its pretty sad
pherminator has left us to pursue greater things in shanghai
like find a wife
and go for cooking classes
and learn the bloody language
i best be getting a great present for his absence

we had a great send off for him though
bubbly buffet at pregos
it will be listed as one of the great send offs of all time i assure you
we felt nauseous, couldnt breath and ate & drank like kings
personally, if i were him, i couldn't have asked for anything better
like i said...great company, good food, good wine
life is perfecto, no?

i guess having 4 great friends here isn't cause enough to complain
they do make life worth living
i have a drinking buddy, an eating buddy, a tv buddy and a bitchin' buddy
enough to complete someone's life

yeah, i am writing crap
i should be explaining myself to the finance department at the moment
i accidentally screwed up some paperwork and now im in the shits
kerap
i best move soon, it about time tho isn't it? i've nearly been here for a year :D

xL

im highly contradictory....i say i have 4 awesome friends, yet i toy with the idea of moving *slaps myself nicely*

of nude brown butts

im back from perth
i should've stayed longer
today is just not working out to be productive at all
11.30am start, long ass lunch from 12.45 till 3, and plans to leave at 5.30
which makes my work day about 3 hours long
and tomorrow...
the lion dance and another long company lunch
woweeeee
basically, im getting paid to eat

perth was fab
went to a nude beach - just cos i can okay
and wish i never went
i saw a nekkid old man in all his glory, and i mean ALL HIS GLORY
and he had this need to bend over all the time
which basically meant that i had an old man mooning me for about 1 hour
fab stuff
everyone should go through it
the last time i saw such a thing was on st kilda beach which hosts an array of old leathery skinned people in g-strings
:D

besides the visual torture
shopping was fab, the sun was out and shining hard, rally was all gorgeously fabulously rounded, he was his patient self when i got the tantrums out and abused my plastic, the food - oh boy the food was good, the alcohol was grand - it was just a slow, perfect holiday

now im back here and no holidays till june
which is okay cos im as broke as the next begging hobo
we are seeing the pherminator off this sunday with a bubbly buffet
&
val is down for the week - which means alot of catching up as the last time i saw her was when she stayed with me in southbank for the radiohead concert

yaya :D

xL

ham and eggs

im off to perth today! yaya!
so a happy chinese new year to those concerned
and for those who aren't....well, enjoy the days off

v-day was great :D
we spent it with grey goose, kfc, mcdonalds and a dose of scrabble
which led to the formulation of our scrabble names

c.tseng: the pherminator
short stuff: boobs
rammers: kunt.um - yeah dee, there is a dot there. what you wanna do huh? whack me ar?
me: whoren - loves it :D

it was pretty fun, except that i propose that we should allow animal noises
like yap/arf
yeah okay, im a sore loser

okay skaters, im off to wrap up stuff at work and rush to the clients - cos im that good
a promotion would be grand

xL

"your ass is like a loaf of bread....i want a slice"
because pharell's songs are always jam packed with intelligence

oh yes its time

you know you've been spending too much of your time at work when:

1. the receptionist at the client's office knows your name/asks how you are/if you are going anywhere for CNY/why they have not seen you for so long/if you have changed your hairstyle
2. the guard downstairs has spotted the rubber lining for your bumper starting to become loose, and asks you every week if you have changed it
3. you just dont know which countries your friends are in....but they were here last week! what do you mean uni is starting....its only...crap...so you're back in melbourne huh?
4. the parking attendent asks where you are going when you leave at 5.30pm
5. your desk at the office looks more home-y than your desk at home
6. your body adjusts to the temperature inside the office, so when you step out into the sun, you suffer from heat stroke
7. you have more meals with people from work than your own mother
8. you wake up at 9.15 am on weekends

so thats why im glad to leave for the week, so i get to:
1. reacquaint myself with the beach and the idea of being laid back
2. hang out with my fave two-some
3. gorge myself silly on processed food (meat pies and sausage rolls to be exact)
4. forget the meaning of hectic/deadlines/frustration
5. listen to his music
6. sit and paw through NW/New Idea/Cosmo/Cleo and feel my intellect literally deteriorating to nothing
7. sleep with a snoring ralph right next to my ear
8. drink cold beer on a hot summer's day

YAYA!

one more point on work:
9. you know you're working too much when you start numbering/bullet-pointing things in your blog as you have been trained to be efficient and effective

boohoohoo

xL

i crave...

its that time of the month and i want

• freshly baked bread with french butter
• a big bowl of spaghetti, with a generous serving of sauce
• alot of beer...copious amounts...like a big vat
• the most creamiest-cannot-move-texture mushroom soup
• alot of beer...copious amounts...like a big vat
• steak
• cheese - in any form
• alot of beer...copious amounts...like a big vat

im so lucky that the grocery selection here is not as extensive as australia or europe..

if not ill def suffer from all sorts of health problems

ive been crazy busy lately that ive had no time for the council of girlfriends

for all i know one of them could be blonde and pregnant by now -_-

i best go socialise and stop with this gilmore girl infactuation that im going through

season 1 down, 5 more seasons to go

just a definition for those who understand why this definition is posted up:

space /speɪs/ Pronunciation Key - [speys] noun, verb, spaced, spac·ing, adjective
freedom or opportunity to express oneself, resolve a personal difficulty, be alone, etc.; allowance, understanding, or noninterference: Right now, you can help by giving me some space.

xL

yunis & lingas

we are back
we didnt kill each other
we climbed
we ate
we drank
we got rather happy
we saw
we felt
and we embraced

it was an experience :D

our villa was gorgeously purple
we conquered the temples with our guns, thats right we did...
we took hilarious tourist photos with much thanks to emily
we got dirty and dusty, which pushed me to take a shower.every.day :(
it got to the extent where we questioned our tans, it could've just been dirt :P
we stepped out of our normal boundaries and ate weird sounding food but it tasted oh so good
we asked if we had ever over an angkor sunset
we got rather happy over pizza and eggs
we bargained and we got annoyed with the word "lady"
we basked in the sun - well short stuff and i did, small eyes miraculously came back the same shade of fair as when she went there
we found out what yunis and lingas were, leaving short stuff with a craving for kulen mountain
we took a ride on tonlesap, grasping the effect of poverty and leaving us 5usd poorer
we sat on a ledge, wondering why sunsets were such a pivotal point in the day, but leaving understanding why
we felt cheated that we had been paying so much for alcohol, eating crap food and encountering sleazy, mean, and horrible people for the past 23 years of our lives
we had moments

argh
now im sitting at my desk, craving for our next holiday - vietnam in june :)
but glad that im off next week to perth to see them
back to the beach, back to wine and cheese, to slow sundays and gorgeous shoes
yaya!

but for the time being, its back to job reqs, demanding clients and the cold airconditioner
ew

xL

getting it

after stumbling around for a year
of sleepless nights and fumbling in the dark
& walking around aimlessly without a map
the creation of the war of words
the knives of manipulation and vindictiveness
the arrows of cynicsm and bitterness
the production of hate and despise
the invention of suspicion

this chapter has finally closed

why still search when perfection is within your reach

xL

burnt

ive finally overdone it
over the festive period
im totally exhausted
i have an ulcer on the left side of my mouth
and i only get it when ive over done it
i got it the last week in spain
and im getting it now

THIS SO TOTALLY SUCKS

its like i think i can do it
but my body says no way bitch, it aint gonna happen

FUCK

even my own body wants to go against me
how like this?
*cries*
i need to sleep

i just needed to vent, now carry on

3 more weeks till kemboja
&
hanoi in june with rammers and small eyes
we're gonna conquer the world with air asia :D

xL

we let rip

happy new years my darlings
im finally back at work
after a 4 day legitimate holiday and 2 day bout of bloody food poisoning
i know
i wish it was alcohol poisoning too
at least i would have a bloody good reason to make the toilet my best friend
:)
and today is friday
its really quite sweet isnt it

new years in singapore was fab
consisted of shopping and eating and of course the requisite drinking
im feeling bloated but with 3 pairs of new shoes
so even if im feeling like crap
at least i look good whilst doing so

all my darlings are finally back
its crazy
but there's this psycho kinda chemistry thats made
that we literally feed off each other
we get noisy, inhumane-like remarks are bounced off each other, we become terribly embarassing and socially inept, we basically let down all out boundaries because these are the people we feel the most comfortable with
we put that mask away
its the time where i look around the table and am content, knowing that if this is what life is about, then life is bloody good
i guess the comfort factor lies with the acknowledgement that our friendship isn't time sensitive, that once we return as a whole...this is what we get, no question about it
so i ask you, as a favour to me, to a clean slate to the new year, in respect to the years that we cannot erase.....
look at the big picture and know that whatever wrong was said and done is so miniscule in comparison---to literally try to forgive and forget
and if you can't, then at least you've tried and i'll move along with you
but goddamn, you can't say that the memories aren't sweet

ill see you all this weekend
7ate9 + asian heritage row on friday
small eye's ritual annual bday dinner on saturday

xL

detoxification of the heart

so xmas has finally passed
the climax to it was far more enjoyable than the actual event
counted down over ham, wine and borat...thrilling and exciting are the words to be used
it was a nearly 5 day celebration after all
so when it hit 12 o'clock, being sober and not face first in the toilet was a good thing

thursday was at sanctuary which wasn't that fab cos i felt the cocktails were pathetically weak but had great company of which i haven't had for nearly 6 months
friday was the office party
which was a bloody laugh and a half
i physically defied my liver to get drunk, get hungover, get drunk and hungover again
starting at 5pm wasn't the best idea
saturday was a pleasure getting stuck in traffic to get my phone and then to get 6 fat hams which led yue's car to smell of RM1,200 worth of pork/as small eye's said "angmoh charsiew"
progressing onto velvet which was a high on its own
sunday's xmas eve was comfortably uneventful
monday was nursing the hangover and physical exhaustion at home and laundry with short stuff, fagface and yue of which i suffered a little this morning

they did say that christmas was 12 days
and yes, i know that its 12 days progressing to christmas, so i have about 8 days of festivity that has yet to be claimed :)

new years plans have ab-so-lute-ly bombed
i dont plan to resurrect it as i have passed it onto short stuff
the original camwhore has plans to do jaagerbombs, not caring where
short stuff and i will go along with that ill supply the redbull bitches
either that or to yue's pool in the middle of kl
or.........
i'll figure it out with the time comes....we still have about 4 odd days
of which im going to be buzzily busy
i have a boxingday bbq tonight, dinner with my fave 7th of may person on weds, tapas&wine @ bodega with recently returned beijing ho on thursday & passed out on friday

it's time to start getting shitfaced

xL

escojo no cuidar

so apparently the food at nero vivo aint that great
& short stuff is now going to plan our new years
*hands over all stress*
i choose not to care anymore
:)

i was looking thru all my photos from spain yesterday
cos im bored to tears at work
and oh my god
how i long to go back
just to not care at all, drink till im blind, eat till im stuffed and tan till im black
and do it all over again the next day

a few things have happened over the last 48 hours significant enough for me to be affected by it
its been a sick cycle of the same thing over and over again
there has been enough of shouting, crying and saying vindictive things
enough of the "what if's" enough of the "maybe-s" enough of the "we could've-s"
enough of the assumption of hope
enough of the skeletons
enough of hoping "that things will eventually work out"
enough of living for the future
so maybe its time to put an end to it
c'est la vie
its left me a little numb
not really caring, hurting or even willing to acknowledge
i know that denial is not part of the 5 step process of getting better
but i'd like to live in my whatever land at the moment
and drink till im blind, eat till im stuffed and tan till im black

anyways, ive thrown myself into a number of things to do from now on
and i will definitely die of exhaustion by christmas day
so merry christmas and if you dont hear from me by the 26th,
well....just leave it till next year then

xL

jack and jill

so id like a vote
ive already put up the two places of which i think is appropriate
i know someone who first-handedly went to nero vivo and thinks the food is not too bad but the ambience is so gorgeous and will rock you to the core his words, not mine
so lets pay for the ambience and make like models do and go anorexic and pick at our food
i dont know about bijan
however i can hear in my head the complaints of---
"you know we can get this at the mamak for like 1/10th of the price right?"
"my mother can make this"
"if like they gave me enough to serve an entire kampung then it will be worth it la"
so u know where im leaning towards
so please leave a comment with your restaurant of choice
and ill do the bookings
terimakasih

i watched crash last night
i feel so blah-ed now
it was so good in a realistic sense, whereby you then realise that its reality so that will confirm make you depressed
&
i had the worse sleep
kept on waking up thinking i had to go work
which is bloody stupid L, who the hell goes to work at 3.35am/5.56am/7.33am/8.30am?
so now im like a walking zombie
the only thing that perked me up today was that i got paid motherfuckers
im all cashed up to go and spend it on something ridiculously expensive and totally nonsensical
:)
wheeeeee

xL

green bamboos and red cherry blossoms

i just watched 'goodbye boys' by bernard chauly
eggsellent
they had all these songs
which we used to sing in school
well..in the pathetic attempt at the music education that they gave us
and all the songs
that we used to chant under the blistering sun before sports day
:)
damn nice la
all those memories that we have tucked away, that never come up unless provoked
i nearly cried :)

so i can only hope that these songs wont be replaced
by kids downloading songs onto itunes
and humming away anti-socially whilst trying to block the outside world

because at the end of it
you realise that its the people and the experiences that have made us what we are today
the "selamat pagi cikgu's" in the morning
and the "terima kasih's" at the end
the sweat that was poured before air-cons were installed
the broken chairs and the desks that threaten to give way
at every single fat text book that we cram inside
instead of taking them home to do our homework
and us, running to school in the morning
to copy from the smartest kid in the class
and the teacher, failing to pick up why, each of us have the same answer

im glad that i grew up here instead of somewhere else
cos you realise that at the end of it
that we cant compare our upbringing to what they have in movies
or what enid blyton has written in her books
that we only had what was passed down to us
from the generations before us
and to that, im thankful for

xL

hop scotch

so its narrowed down to these two places...

1. bijan
2. nero vivo

both on jalan ceylon

both are next to each other but in the same compound

different house for different restaurant

they both look gorgeous and are set apart from the main area in ceylon hillis
and yes slutface, if we really must, we can go to the green man after that

but then again, alot of things look pretty good when you are dividing 30+ chicken wings between 3 ppl on a friday night....
ah, being 22...its rather sweet

can la wei = it is possible

so i have a long weekend
and another long weekend after that
and another long one after that
how to work you tell me?

so i've narrowed it down to (suburbs only cos think what? i have lots of time ah?)
1. ceylon hills - google map it la :P
2. this jln off jalan maarof - opus that area...
3. the westin - because prego's treated me so nicely when i was there
4. ceylon hills
5. we rent an apartment at the ascott, cook dinner (thats right bitches) and bring wine... this ascott thing better be decided by tuesday next week or forget it

why L? why KL? why you so stubborn? never fucking learn issit? eh, you don't know what jam is ar? can u not be a lemming? can't u think of a quieter place? bbq can ar? liddat then i'll make my own plans ler...eh, mamak only la...

WHY?

cos the only bloody suggestion i see is hassi's PD...which is good suggestion *thumbs up short stuff*

im going to have a look at ceylon hills this weekend. i lub it la...i lub it muchos....
and the place near jln maarof? its between opus and attic :P

peace out and remember me when you're buying christmas presents as the one who saved ur new years :P

xL

feliz navidad...now concentrate on making me happy

im disgustingly bored in the office
mind you, after stating this....the work is going to somehow magically pile up
and ill be whining about my lack of free time
whatever la
i'll never get it right

so here's is my wishlist of 06
and considering i live in my own little reality, all these material goods are attainable in my mind
so i dont want to hear crap about my being extravagantly stupid
i like la :P

1. a huge loft apartment that takes up an entire floor overlooking the entire klang valley with its own private swimming pool
2. a black maserati coupe with the number plate L75...just so i can be pimpin'
3. black fette sheets with an obscenely high thread count
4. a huge villa in the hills of barcelona..just cos
5. to own a huge media conglomerate so i can take over the world...rupert murdoch, please move aside
6. to own an island...either in french polynesia or somewhere in the med (im not fussed here)... basically a piece of property in italy, spain, LA, new york, gay paris, melbourne, and a few in kl
7. my own private jet to take me anywhere in the world, at any time...
8. ooodles and bucketloads of money

por que no?

or

on a slightly more realistic note ... pfft ... as if that won't come true anyway ;P

1. the gucci holder for my ipod (its getting scratched severely)
2. jewellery from gucci's new line
3. ralphy (as in my dog, not ralph lauren...however if you can kidnap him and make him design a line just for me and ralphy, ill be equally as gratious)
4. bcbg's new line of dresses (2 or 3 will be fine- especially the black and white ones)
5. a year's supply of books (preferbly borders, cos the selection of fiction at mph totally shits me these days)
6. coach's signature stripe accordian wallet
7. a pimpin' new years celebration with all my darlings, fab food and fab wine...because it's been awhile hasn't it?

i know im going to get bitch slapped nicely for asking for all this...after all, isn't it only just money ;)

but seriously my dunggus...what are the plans for new years? can we go someplace fabulous, have a long table of excellent food and wine...to drink and be merry...with lots of love and kisses?

considering im free till no extent at the moment..ill be researching places with new year dinners and all that jazz...ill be posting up only 5 places of interest (well to me of course, considering i dont see anyone else doing anything) and i would like a vote..ill book it...ill even book escorts if need be ;)

lets make this a fab new years okay? not some rush to the top of bangsar hill to somehow try to catch a glimpse of fire in the sky?

xL

vanish if you wish

so i was with rosebud today at one utama
just cos we are suckers
and goddamn, the toffeenut latte concoction at starbucks looked terribly tempting
so in we went
she made me pay of course

so starbucks are evidently rather adamant on cashing in on this toffenut craze like its going out of fashion
i obliged and eagerly threw my money into their pockets of course, fuelling their quest to conquer the world by drowning us in caffeine
by ordering two drinks and a muffin
so this little malay dude behind the counter was so nervous
must've been his first day or something

and he asked

"do you want me to hot your muffin?"
all wide eyed and innocent

i nearly died-ed laughing right there and then

sigh
either im terribly dirty minded or the kampungs better start education their little ones about the real world....either that, or start installing computers with connection to the internet

xL

oh hello, where has all that weight gone?

iiiiimmmmm fffffffffrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeee
(im free)

im finally free
my campaign is nearly done
it was a shocking last week of no sleep, shouting, fighting and evil eyes
but we managed to pull through and none of us have collapsed
*pats myself on the back*
:)
im crossing my fingers that my life will return to the normal 10am to 6pm routine

however...
the christmas committee list has come out for the office christmas party
-_-
my name was on it
as co-mc (master of ceremony for you ignorants)
oh the shock and the horror
ive whined about this to small eyes and slutface already
and of course, it was my fault...i talk too much
now see what happens?
i better start penning my resignation letter for the day after
cos god knows what will happen when i go and start announcing things after a few glasses of wine
*cries*

i know my blog has gotten boring and dull
and small eye's blog is going to shit all over mine soon
but i dont care
why? cos i dont have to :P

well im not going to sit here and contemplate the lack of pictures and the lame ass formatting of my blog..i mean, ppl are going to start thinking i care...which i dont
it doesn't matter anyway, i guest blog there :)
im off to brave the hordes of disgusting little things they call children and disgusting old things they call aunties at 1 utama now
the huge sale just started im really asking for it aren't i?
i have a reason to go
my chachi is leaving me
and her farewell is on tonight at 7ate9
so i have to get her something kick ass and memorable
so she will remember me when she's in the land of assholes
and that she will never find another chachi like me. ever.

people are slowly trickling in from australia
i dont think i realised how much i missed them until i saw them
i get to see my germz again tonight and i saw shanti the other night
WILL THE REST OF YOU GET YOUR ASSES BACK A LITTLE FASTER ?

xL

the devil may care

i am officially going to collapse any moment now
seriously, im just waiting for a darkness to come over me
and to wake up in some public *ew* hospital
*ew*

i dont even want to go into how much hassle the client is giving
actually, hassle ain't the word for it
shit
yes, shit is more appropriate
this shit is going to be the reason to why half of my team is going to work well into the am for
bloody misguided fools
so please dont even bother trying to contact me until wednesday
when recover from the impact of hell on earth
that is, if i recover

the funniest thing is....
i like it
i mean, i dont love it, and by gosh i'll complain about it....
but i dont feel the need to throw the towel in
i like the hustle of it all, it makes me feel productive
and i've fallen into a somewhat happy, satisfying balance of work and play
and it helps that nearly all my friends are in the same or similar industry too
which i have yet to decide if its good or bad
small eyes and i know that we need a few more doctors and lawyers in the equation

however saying that...i am physically and mentally exhausted from the last 7 days
from the kancils to 10am colour proof session the next day to velvet to mifa
im about to collapse

whoever said work hard and play harder evidently was on drugs
and didnt have to combat the lousy feeling of exhaustion

thats why im here at my laptop, typing away happily at 6pm on a sunday evening
rather than in a bar drinking the demise of the weekend
and by the way, after going to the shows at mifa, i have a newfound respektah for malaysian designers. they really do have so much to offer and have such brilliant minds. it was hardly a waste getting up at 10am today to catch the show

so there is nothing much i can do
but to toast with my water bottle to the next 7 days
*sigh*

xL

round round baby round round

im being allowed to guest blog @ lowshaolyn.com
but then i realised, how can i guest blog when i dont even blog here?
well i do blog here, just not that freakin often
i dont even want to go into how busy i have been this week
im only at home to shower and sleep
hey, at least i shower right? thats a good thing :P

but then i realised, im realising a whole lot of things for those who say im not perceptive
that maybe its a good thing im blogging there
on her little piece 'of internet real estate'
so one day, we can becoming advertising moguls and takeover the world
and advertise the way its supposed to be done
with ingenuity, ethics *cough* and to actually make an impact by grabbing its balls and running with it

well im off
i have work to do
and id like to start blogging small eyes, i really would, if the msg stop coming up as
"you are not permitted....."
help me help you small eyes

xL

how we operate the detroit swing 66

Happy birthday slutface! i know, a day early, but nevertheless :) may all your wishes of hot men in little clothes and tight asses come true :P i couldn't ask for a more appropriate partner to bitch with, to listen to me whining and to hatch plans for hapsap to dress as a policewoman with... to many more excellent ideas and to even more hot men :)

im happy again
i got my vanity fairs
my collection now doesn't have a gaping hole screaming for 554 anymore
i got a dude to save me a copy every month
which will save me the hassle of running from borders (who's selection sux) to mph to any newsstand that looks like it carries some sort of international magazine selection
:)
whoever said that im high maintenance has seriously got it all wrong

im trying out this whole simplistic lifestyle thing
the whole water off the back, not getting too involved in politics kinda thing
its working for me
my skin looks better and my hair has more volume
and all i worry about now is who the hell is going to feed me dinner at night
cos we all know fo sho that rosebud does not cook

went to a place called bubble lounge in ceylon hills last night
and it was gorgeous
something you get out of melbourne
and there were all these little cafes and restaurants around it that all looked so chic
and there weren't hordes of ppl running up and down the street or shouting down the mobile or just being the rude kl ppl that we normally are
it had such a chilled atmosphere
of where u could just sit and watch the world go by
and u can almost forget that you're only a stone's throw away from alor, prostitute capital of kl

i sound like a travel writer now
maybe that should be my next occupation
combining my two loves of travel and writing
duh *smacks head*

well im out to have a pre bday feast with dayvey at chillis now
i mean, where else right?

xL

as he goes left and you stay right

you know how when you're underwater for the longest time
and then you come up to the surface
and the first breath you take?
i feel like that now
and it should be accompanied with some sort of relief and joy
but no
i feel all blah-ed cos i know that this shit is never ending

its like it starts
then when you think it stops
you look up and there's a pile of crap just waiting to be dropped onto your head again

so small eyes and i went to bodega to make ourselves feel better
you know, cos misery does love company
and for that small second, with the chocolate tart, tiramisu, ice cream, sangria and an excellent band....there was this glimmer that all will be right
then the next day came and it started all over again

WARGH

im so not cut out to work im telling you
i want to run away to some secluded beach
and open some boat company that will ferry tourists around
and i wont care about all the materialistic things in life
cos all that i'd need would be the sun, the sea, maybe a whole lot of home made rum, cigarettes, gorgeous sarongs, a hammock, a hut with a huge 4 poster bed with that mosquito net thing, a day bed....

oh who the hell am i kidding?
i cant run away....i do need my material goods
maybe when ive worked in this god forsaken rat race for another 2 decades...
i could toy with the idea of retiring at 40 probably through scamming and manipulating
and get myself a beach house

that sounds sweet but another 2 decades of this? i've barely lasted 3 months

xL

on rings, flings and other things

i got my baby back
she went all the way to penang for a long assed holiday
and now she's home
all brand spankin new
and working like a charm
purrrrrr
i hope she missed me as much as i missed her

i just watched jerry maguire
and i cried
i swear i dont remember tearing when i watched it the first time
all i remember was the whole "you had me at hello" line that made me swoon
and giggle like a school girl...which i was
but then again, the first time was nearly a decade ago
so maybe i didnt quite understand the complexities of relationships
and boy oh boy do i understand them now.........

i would like to go back to when i believed this is how it worked
girl meets boy. boy meets girl. boy and girl fall in love. boy and girl get married and move to surburbia and have a ton of babies without feeling the economic pinch. boy and girl turn old together. boy and girl never fight. boy and girl will always be each other's number 1.

-_-
now?
lets just chuck in a few realistic problems and concepts...you know, just for the fun of it :)

"why don't you spend enough time with me?"
"where do you actually see this going?"
"what exactly do you mean by that?"
"when you say break, do you mean break up?"
"who was that?"
"we're not getting married till i get my pre-nup"
"do you actually grasp the concept of quality time?"
"lets talk"
"omfg, can u stop crying?"
"i really am quite sick of your cooking"
"you really do seem like you are from another planet"

no b, this is not directed at you, so don't go all sensitive on me...

maybe it was like that before, but then again, who's to say that they didnt have problems of their own?
i am hardly one that should say anything on this matter
as this matter of a healthy, strong, stable (which is hard when i myself am a little unstable) relationship does seem quite foreign to me
oh my god, why did i even open this can of worms?

ill leave you to it
i have two pizzas in front of me
stupid goddamn period really
i turn into my own worst enemy with my emotions and hunger pangs flying all over the place

xL

ps: alcohol consumption this week (yes, i mean the whole entire 7 days) -- 1 beer
show me a person that said i was weak and ill show you someone who evidently doesn't know me

a serving of a pair of balls, with a shot of testosterone on the side

i really dislike being a chick
i go from being super duper fucking happy to crappy in less than one second
i go to bed grumpy and wake up happy
i know that ive committed enough sins in my short span on earth
but dammit, god is really spiting me at the moment
he picks about 4 days a month to be very malicious towards me

i can eat a horse
ill cry over the fact that my hair won't grow any faster
ill bitch that its 5pm when there really isnt much i can do about it
ill plan the death of someone over a nasty look that they've given me
ill stab someone verbally over something so miniscule, ill laugh about it whilst stabbing them
i dont laugh
i dont smile
i dont like being social
and my small pathetic ability to be sympathetic is upped to being non-existent

im going into isolation from the outside world this whole week
and it does kinda help considering im already broke
and it does kinda help considering i have 4 gigs worth of tv to watch at home

boo to being so sensitive to my hormones
i really wish i had a pair of balls
i swear, everything would be made so much easier
i would be so cut throat i swear

even if i accepted this whole hormonal thing,
i would much prefer to even feel motherly and cry over puppies and weddings and buy laura ashley bedsheets *hee hee germz*
rather than feel like im going to turn into a serial killer at any given moment

anyhoo, not much i can do either than to bitch and whine
so take note of when these kinda posts are coming and and start avoiding me based on this 31 day cycle :)

xL

adorarlo para siempre; nunca aislar

im procrasinating by blogging
im supposed to be at the gym bodybalancing
pfft
i shouldn't have done this whole blog thing
now i feel the pressure to come up with witty things to say
or even subjects of actual importance that commands me writing about it
and i cant keep on writing about my alcoholic ways
cos that would inadvertently be broadcasting that im dependent on the substance
which i really quite am
but i still love my nicotine so much more though
*sigh*
evidently, i need my little addictions to keep me chugging on

and my life isn't at all depressing
its pretty effing sweet actually
and i believe the best writing comes out of a tortured soul
like alanis in the 90s
not current-alanis-who-is-shacking-up-with-ryan-hot-stuff-reynolds

the only thing that is actually bugging me is that how absent rosebud has been
its gotten to the extent of when she is home, i feel uncomfortable
she's off again tomorrow
and off again in two weeks
talk about the perfect dysfucntional family of 3

mother: hangs out with a bunch of psychotic pre-menapausal women who encourages her 'alternative' ways of raising her children;travels everywhere and at any given moment;is very loud; is very temperamental;can be described as terribly irrational
first child: addicted to anything and everything; can't be in one place for too long; has a rather significant identity crisis problem;omg, lets not even continue on....im sure we all dont have all day to delve into the many issues that are habouring inside me
second child: has an even more significant identity crisis (looks indian/malay, is chinese, raised in australia, thinks she's jamaican); addicted to anything and everything; will never date a chinese boy; can be even more spiteful than first child;holds deep resentment towards mother for failing to recognise that she is already 18

why im not on prozac yet amazes me

xL

ps im broke and its only been 4 days since i got paid thanks alot small eyes...there went nearly 700 on material goods *boohoohoo* can we start eating at coffeeshops from now on?

we were brave like soldiers falling down under the pale moonlight

happy birthday short stuff :) wish i was there to down that veuve with you
but have fun getting ab-so-lute-ly wasted on your birthday
its the only day of the year where you can self-indulge like that and have no one to
apologize to :) love you lots woman - you've been a fantastic friend of all sorts


its friday tomorrow
yay
i dont know who the hell i was fooling when i said i was going to de-tox
im getting my period
the detox can wait till next week or something, or whenever aunt ruby decides to leave

i hate being a chick
i get temperatmental
i get emotional
i hate things
i love things
all at the same bloody time
do you know how confusing that is for me? let alone everyone else that crosses my path?

work is al-right
nothing to shout about, but nothing to whine about either
other than the fact that i was here till 10 on monday
*cries*
but i got paid
so everything does kinda sorta somehow evens out

im rather neutral at the moment, which makes for a boring blog
im going to bed this saturday night for those who would like to join me ;)
in a hardly non-kinky sense
its a new bar on asian heritage row

xL