mary mary quite contrary

so of late ive been having immense internal conflict
and i really don't think ive experienced something like this before
im just swinging on a pendulum from one extreme to another
so i did some thinking
and that this conflict was because i decided to make a move
based on a decision based not wholely on me
which was really, a first
and you knew that, they knew that, i knew that
so i made a decision to end this conflict once and for all
to turn it around, and make my stay here next year mine
to own that decision
so the tears, the smiles, the laughter, the questions, the "oh fucks", the rights and the lefts - they would be all mine and it feels better that way
so of course, i had to drastically change that up...again, you know, just for the drama
i told the rosebud thanks but no thanks to the new car
i know, my heart broke knowing i wont be smelling new leather car seats
and told her to instead let me do what i do best and run away next year
so this plan B was conjured up out of the blue
as many of my other plans
so at the moment, summer 08 has been extended to winter
jesus fucking tittie christ hey

but who knows next week plans may change again
but fo sho something better come out of L rejecting a new car

so the weekend saw:
1. mansion on friday with anini and long legs : mansion is a damn good looking place with silver couches and a spacious layout, however not impressed with them not having any white wine, when their menu boasts 4 pages of selection. as anini said "you had one chance to impress us..." whatever it is, people always remember the bad things and hardly ever the good.

2. a whole day of wedding events on saturday with a little contact sport in the middle:
for a wedding, it wasn't as romantic as i expected...the food was pretty dope though. so thumbs up for that.
kick boxing for 1.5 hours left me rushed with adrenalin and led me signing up for one month of people encouraging me to whack stuff. really. fucking. hard. it was a cathartic release because it feels damn good, just hitting something :)

3. 21/the outside of mansion/atrium on saturday night with hassi. after being told that mansion was 'closed' -_- a long island beach tea or something saved the night.

4. a very sore L permanently attached to the sofa on sunday. the kickboxing took a whole lot out of me as it has been a while since i've worked my upper body that much. my wrists, my palms and even my fingers were sore. sakit GBB dude

5. me starting a new affair with my love for words. so no, i don't just write here on this blog. i typed for a good 4 hours yesterday and it was really satisfying, it was almost as if i had all this inside me pented up and it was all purged yesterday. it made me forget things, feel things i've boxed away for awhile and gave me a whole lot of clarity. it was a breath of fresh air

to top this rather blah monday post off:

happy burdday gayve my love (for tomorrow lah)
we tried to have a great one with you on saturday night but you were so wasted that we just let you be instead :) you got your hot men in little clothes this year so next year, i hope that you find a naked hot man willing to please you in all different areas ;)
hey, i was going with mental and emotional...what were you thinking?
*insert mass representation of love here*

xL